Words of Wisdom: Forgiveness

“To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.”

~ Robert Muller

“We are all doing the best we can with the understanding, knowledge, and awareness we have… We may not know how to forgive, and we may not want to forgive; but the very fact we say we are willing to forgive begins the healing practice.”

~Louise Hay

“Holding resentment is like eating poison and waiting for the other person to keel over.”

~ Unknown

“I can forgive, but I cannot forget, is only another way of saying, I will not forgive. Forgiveness ought to be like a cancelled note – torn in two, and burned up, so that it never can be shown against one. “

~ Henry Ward Beecher

When there’s something keeping you up at night, the answer is always FORGIVENESS

Its currently the wee hours of the morning as I write this post. I guess you could say that sleep has gotten away from me. This is mainly because of a few negative thoughts that I just couldn’t seem to let go of as a result of a seemingly challenge filled day. I won’t dare bore (or entertain) you with the intricate details, but I will share with you the invaluable lessons that I’ve learned.

The lesson touches upon one of my favorite affirmations by my favorite author of all time, Louise Hay, and deals with the subject of forgiveness, and it goes like this:

“I forgive you for not being the way I wanted you to be. I forgive you and I lovingly set you free.” –Louise Hay

Part of the reason that I love this affirmation so much, is because it not only helps with directing one’s thoughts towards thoughts of forgiveness–forgiveness of others, and forgiveness of oneself– but it helps to direct one’s thoughts towards thoughts of compassion and being non-judgemental.

It’s so easy for us as human beings to judge those people who do, or say things in ways that we disapprove of. So much so, that we become angry or upset with them, often applying labels as we recount those experiences. These very labels that we apply to others are just one more reason that we tell ourselves that we cannot forgive that person.

For example, If someone is having a really bad day and they take it out on you, many would naturally feel some level of offense, and possibly label this particular person as being rude, or offensive in that moment, and choose to respond to this person from this feeling space. Now whether the response is positive or negative, ideas have already been formed about who, or what this individual is like.

Pretty reasonable rationale right?..

But how often is it that before passing judgement on the situation, we actually put ourselves in the other person’s shoes. Now I’m not saying that one has to give a pass to others for negative behavior. But I am saying that perhaps having an understanding that “hurt people, hurt people,” and that no one’s negative behavior is ever something to be taken personal, would help us to see life differently, and have more pleasant experiences to be grateful for.

This affirmation expresses this best because when we are offended by someone’s behavior, it is because we are judging them for not being the way we want them to be. This very judgement is what keeps us from having compassion and understanding of the human experience. And a major part of the human experience deals with the ways in which we cope with life, based on the experiences that we have while we are here. If we can’t place ourselves in the shoes of someone else, yes, even if they have somehow wronged us, then forgiveness and peace about the situation becomes difficult to achieve and there will be a constant internal conflict whenever this person is in your presence, or you speak of the situation.

Most importantly, judging others is merely a reflection of the ways in which we judge ourselves. We must learn to take other people’s behavior and choices less personal, and understand that they, just like you and I, are only responding to life based on coping mechanisms that have been built as a result of life experiences. Becoming aware of your own ways of coping, and being gentle with yourself as you look to those coping mechanisms that serve you best is the beginning of learning how to forgive. Once you learn to love yourself through your own transition/journey– just as God and the Universe loves us despite our flaws– forgiveness, compassion, and empathy will soon follow with a lot less effort.

But it starts with YOU.

…Some lesson to receive at this hour of the morning, but its one worth sharing… Now off to sleep I go.

Love,

@BCSTARKS

I was inspired by this AMAZING Post: How Will You Start the New Year?

As my readers know, I am a huge fan of author and metaphysical lecturer Louise Hay and all of the wisdom and life lessons that she’s shared throughout her 86 years of life. Most recently, I came across a post featured on her blog YouCanHealYourLife.com which asks a simple question: How will you start the new year? An excerpt from the post goes like this:

The New Year is upon us. We welcome the New Year with love and joy, know that what we give out comes back to us multiplied. As you begin your New Year, ask yourself these simple questions:

What shall I now release from my life?

What or who no longer works for me?

What am I holding on to that holds me back?

What thoughts or beliefs belong to the old me?

How am I being unloving to myself?

What do I believe that really works for me?

Am I ready to let go?

What is going on in my life that is terrific and wonderful?

Where am I being very loving to myself?

What I love most is the affirmation that Louise shares at the end of her post, which goes like this:

I am not limited by statistics, medical opinions, time or authorities.

I am one with the infinite wisdom and capabilities of the Universe itself.

All good is available to me, right here and right now.

All I have to do is to use the power of my thoughts to create that which I desire.

My readers also know that I am HUGE on affirmations as well. But for those of you who don’t know what exactly an affirmation is, here’s the beauty of them.

Affirmations are not quotes. They are statements that are positive in nature, and reflect the birthright of every human being. Affirmations are often the opposite of every negative thing that we as humans think to ourselves as a result of our life experiences. However, they can also become the new thoughts that we train ourselves to think, and ultimately shape the energy that we bring to each day that we are a part of this life. Afterall,  what you believe about life, and the energy and thoughts that you bring to the world is what your life ultimately becomes. But it all starts with yourself. So whatever you do, get to loving you!  Begin to be more conscious of the thoughts that you are AFFIRMING in your own life because it matters.

Love,

@BCSTARKS

Words of Wisdom

Affirmation:  “I deserve all the good that I desire for my life, and the Universe supports me as I am. I love and approve of myself. I am always safe and secure, and all is well in my world.” 

– Borrowed from Louise Hay

What inspired you today?

For the past few months, I’ve been doing what great writers such as Louise Hay and Abraham Hicks refer to as “mental work.”

For what, you may be wondering?

For re-directing my thoughts. It pays to think big and truly believe in thoughts of love, abundance, happiness, creativity, and prosperity.

Unfortunately, the average person rarely ever believes in those thoughts that completely contradict the things that they are experiencing in their current reality.

For example, someone who has been told negative things and abused all of their lives, may occasionally think thoughts that are positive, yet don’t really believe those thoughts because everything that they have experienced in life has been mostly negative. The things that they have experienced have taken a toll on their confidence and self-esteem, and ultimately their faith. As a result, negative thoughts become second nature, and so do negative experiences (The Law of Attraction).

The same can be true for someone who grows up poor… Perhaps, as a result of their circumstances, they believe that they never have enough money, or food, or clothes, etc… Perhaps their experiences with lack leads to feelings of unworthiness, instability, or a lack of safety and security.

However, this same person can also hold dreams of one day being rich. The only problem is that if they’re consistently holding dominant thoughts of fear or “lack,” then they hold themselves in a space where there will never be enough. And should they ever break free and become wealthy, then no amount of money, or material goods will ever suffice.

This is where “mental work” comes in. In this context “mental work” refers to the re-training, or redirecting of thoughts from negative to positive, until those thoughts become second nature; replacing old thoughts. Life teaches you that you are what you believe you are, and life becomes whatever dominant thoughts you hold in regards to it.

When you’re used to thinking and believing certain ideas about life, it’s not easy to change them, especially if they have become a dominant part of your personality. But change can happen in every one of us if we are willing to do the mental work.

The mental work begins at the core of whatever thoughts you may hold that keep you from living the life you want to live. Afterall, the only limitations that truly exist are those we set for ourselves. Identify the thoughts that keep you in bondage and understand where they came from. Why do you believe this thought? Who and what contributed to this belief. Once you find the source, learn to forgive everyone and everything, including you. It’s the ONLY way to heal and move forward.

The next step is to begin to tell yourself a different, and more positive story to replace previous thoughts. Do this as often as a negative thought creeps into your mind. Do it until you firmly believe in the new thoughts. Afterall,:

“A belief is just a thought that you keep thinking until you convince yourself that its true.” A. Hicks

I’m inspired because each day I see evidence of my own growth. Letting go of old fears continues to be quite liberating. I hope the same can one day be true for all who desire change in their lives. It all starts in the mind.

Love,

@BCSTARKS

Louise Hay says ‘You Can Heal Your Life’: The powerful connection between thoughts, the body, & life

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I was first introduced to the concept of the “law of attraction” as a sophomore in college. It’s a concept that has resonated with my spirit ever since. That’s probably because I was raised in a household that taught me that I could do and be anything in life as long as I believed it, and put lots of work into it.

In addition to that, growing up Christian Baptist taught me to ‘ask, and I shall receive… seek, and I shall find… knock, and the or shall be opened.’ And I could never forget one of my favorite BIBLE verses (okay, so I can’t remember exactly, lol) that says, “But wilt thou know ‘o’ vain man, that faith without works is dead?”

These very ideas shape who I have become today and forever more. But I have yet to become more impressed by any other groundbreaking piece of literature or idea, than that of bestselling author and metaphysics guru Louise Hay’s book titled, You Can Heal Your Life.

If you’re not familiar with the concept of the law of attraction, it pretty much states that your thoughts and the energy behind them are what shape your life experiences. In other words, most of what happens in life is not pure chance, but involves more interaction on your own part than you realize.

Louise takes this concept one step further by introducing the effect of thoughts on the body. Believe it or not, you can think yourself sick! Hence the reason why stress, anxiety, and depression can all lead to further bodily complications. According to metaphysical teachings, a lifetime of resentment, anger, and guilt (all emotions/ dis-eases of the mind) can lead to cancer, AIDS, and even simple things like ulcers (all dis-eases in the body).

But just as it is possible that you make yourself sick, you also have the power to make yourself well. Louise offers affirmations that help to re-program a lifetime of fear and negative thinking into new beginnings of self-love, forgiveness, compassion, overall well-being, and patience with the processes of life.

Reading this book can be life changing. At least, it has been for me. I would recommend everyone to check it out. Even if you don’t agree with things that she shares in her book, it will definitely force you to think about changing old patterns of thought.

Until next time, get ya mind right ppl!

Much Love,

@BCSTARKS 🙂