Words of Wisdom: Reflections on Sexual Healing and Marvin Gaye

“When sex is of the Holy Spirit, it is a deepening of communication. When it is of the ego, it is  a substitute for communication. The Holy Spirit uses sex to heal us; the ego uses it to wound us. Sometimes we have thought that sex with another person would cement the bond between us, and instead it turned out to manufacture more illusion and anxiety than there was before. It is only when sex is a vehicle of spiritual communion that it is truly loving, that it joins us to another person. Then it is a sacred act. Holiness means the presence of a loving purpose, and in that sense, the body and its accouterments can be a holy expression. Many spiritual seekers have felt the need to eschew all body related things. But that can be as ego-centered as a overattachment to the physical. Anything used to spread joy and communicate love is a part of GOD’s plan for salvation.” — Marianne Williamson, A Return To Love p. 250-251

This quote gave me a whole new perspective on Marvin Gaye’s Grammy Award winning album Sexual Healing. In case you’ve never heard the song, or if you just love it like I do, check it out below along with the lyrics. Also, check out Sexual Healing: What It Means, Why It Matters for an amazing lesson on the topic.
Sexual Healing Lyrics:
Ooh, now let’s get down tonight
Baby I’m hot just like an oven
I need some lovin’
And baby, I can’t hold it much longer
It’s getting stronger and stronger
And when I get that feeling
I want Sexual Healing
Sexual Healing, oh baby
Makes me feel so fine
Helps to relieve my mind
Sexual Healing baby, is good for me
Sexual Healing is something that’s good for me
Whenever blue tear drops are falling
And my emotional stability is leaving me
There is something I can do
I can get on the telephone and call you up baby, and
Honey I know you’ll be there to relieve me
The love you give to me will free me
If you don’t know the things you’re dealing
I can tell you, darling, that its Sexual Healing
Get up, Get up, Get up, Get up, let’s make love tonight
Wake up, Wake up, Wake up, Wake up, ‘cos you do it right
Baby I got sick this morning
A sea was storming inside of me
Baby I think I’m capsizing
The waves are rising and rising
And when I get that feeling
I want Sexual Healing
Sexual Healing is good for me
Makes me feel so fine, it’s such a rush
Helps to relieve the mind, and it’s good for us
Sexual Healing, baby, is good for me
Sexual Healing is something that’s good for me
And it’s good for me and it’s good to me
My baby ohhh
Come take control, just grab a hold
Of my body and mind soon we’ll be making it
Honey, oh we’re feeling fine
You’re my medicine open up and let me in
Darling, you’re so great
I can’t wait for you to operate
I can’t wait for you to operate
When I get this feeling, I need Sexual Healing [Ad lib]

 

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Brittnay’s Corner: Sexual Healing: What It Means, Why It Matters

Yes, I’m taking it there! But bear with me because this isn’t your typical religious based  speech on why you should save yourself for marriage, or be guilted  by your past. I’ll leave that part to the folks who handle that best. That’s out of my league. “Nope, not I,”  said the cat.

I do, however,  intend to share with you a lesson that almost knocked my socks off when I read it. And it’s not that I haven’t heard similar teachings, but I’ve never heard it stated in a way that actually sits well with my spirit. A way that doesn’t leave me feeling any awkwardness whatsoever… you know, guilty, anxious or ashamed. Instead, I was filled with feelings of pure love and acceptance, which is what any true word of GOD and the DIVINE should feel  like (Your spirit always KNOWS the source from which it comes…its all in how you feel).

Now to the lesson…

A Course In Miracles (ACIM) teaches us that we are not truly the physical body form that we identify ourselves by. Instead, we should view ourselves as spiritual beings having a physical/ human experience here on Earth. With that said, we must be able to view ourselves beyond our physical bodies and the physical material world that we live in.

That’s all pretty cool… obvious for some. But let’s take it a step further.

ACIM also tells us the following:

“When you equate yourself with a body[or another person in the same way], you will always experience depression [or anxiety].”

This is true when we are critical with ourselves or others about our weight, or physical attractiveness, material wealth/success, etc… It’s never a good feeling when we only fully identify ourselves as our physical bodies or material wealth because these are things that can and will constantly change, just as everything else in the physical realm. And let’s face it, we’re all worth wayyy more than what’s on the surface. In fact, we can all agree the only true constants are Spirit, LOVE and GOD… which are all ONE.

Stay with me here…

According to one of my favorite authors, Marianne Williamson in her bestselling title A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of A Course In Miracles, “One of the ways the body can be used to manufacture depression is through loveless sex.” This is because we tend to project either love or fear when we partake in sexual activities. Williamson states:

“When sex is of the Holy Spirit, it is a deepening of communication. When it is of the ego, it is  a substitute for communication. The Holy Spirit uses sex to heal us; the ego uses it to wound us. Sometimes we have thought that sex with another person would cement the bond between us, and instead it turned out to manufacture more illusion and anxiety than there was before. It is only when sex is a vehicle of spiritual communion that it is truly loving, that it joins us to another person. Then it is a sacred act.– Marianne Williamson, A Return To Love p. 250

In other words, when we partake in loveless sex, we are merely trying to fill a void for something else that we may feel is missing. In this context, sex is used as a coping mechanism that is no different from drugs, or food, or whatever else we humans have been known to use in order to cover up or communicate the true pain that may have never been healed from our past. For example, when a male/female has sex outside of an a loving relationship that has been established prior to sexual interaction, deep down he/she may subconsciously be attempting to communicate or fill a void of their true desire to be loved, wanted, or accepted as whole by another. Sex would thus be a substitution for true communication between that person, and his/her partner(s). There is always a story behind everything in life, whether deep or shallow. This is why communication on the surface goes a looooong way!

Ohhhh, but it gets better!!

Williamson goes on to share another part of this lesson that ACIM teaches, and that is one of the true definitions of what it means to be Holy as it relates to life, and in this context, sex:

“Holiness means the presence of a loving purpose, and in that sense, the body and its accouterments can be a holy expression. Many spiritual seekers have felt the need to eschew all body related things. But that can be as ego-centered as an overattachment to the physical. Anything used to spread joy and communicate love is a part of GOD’s plan for salvation.” — Marianne Williamson, A Return To Love p. 250

Now tell me that doesn’t give you a whole new perspective on Marvin Gaye’s Sexual Healing!

No matter how man tries to bog it down with condemnation and ridicule, sex was created by the DIVINE as a form of communication on the deepest level… Yes, for us humans it gets no better than pure physical intimacy. But it’s only when its used for the pure purpose of LOVE, that it feels HEAVENLY through and through; not just for the moment. Hence why most religions point in the direction of marriage before sex, and the whole spiel on how man unites as one during meaningful intercourse. The truth is, all sex is meaningful. We just have to know ourselves well enough to know just what we are truly attempting to communicate to the Universe and our partner(s) in spirit.  For we will only experience the truth of our intentions. Therefore, perhaps we should heavily consider having only loving connections… at least at some point in our lives.

If love is what we truly desire, then love is what we ought to communicate with those we interact with in life in as many ways possible. First, we must love and accept ourselves as whole and complete beings right where we are. For in GOD’s eyes, man was perfectly and masterfully created. Once there, if others can accept the whole of you and love you as you are in return, then perhaps they are worthy of your sexual healing, and vice versa of course. DOPE, right!?!

Don’t ever say that I never tried to enlightened you! lol

Meanwhile, feel free to drop some of your thoughts on the topic in the comment section below.

Love,

@BCSTARKS