BrittNay’s Corner: What I Resist, Persists…

Today, for the first time I became aware of how often I allow my mind to be consumed by the things and experiences that don’t please me. For the first time I was able to recognize the very moment that my negative thoughts drifted so far that anxiety began to creep up on me. I started feeling anxious and couldn’t focus long enough to complete the task at hand. My emotions were all over the place, and peace was the farthest thing from me. All of this because I could not take my mind off of those things that I believed weren’t working for me. From my current 9-5 and my living situation, to my diet and all the things that I want to change. You name it, my mind was on it. And boy did it go on and on and on…

“Negative thoughts stick around because we believe them, not because we want them or choose them.”

Andrew J. Bernstein

That is, until something within me recognized the chaos that was going on my mind. I like to call that something my “inner knowing.” That inner knowing recognized the verbal and emotional assault that I subconsciously inflicted upon myself as I uncontrollably dissected how I could have and should have done things differently, or how the experiences that I was having was somehow less than fair. My observer remained still and awakened to the fact that “it” was not a part of this negative space that was being created within me. This inner knowing knew the truth about life, about my circumstances, and about what is possible for me… and “it” became my great escape from the toxic false reality that I had inflicted upon myself.  Before this moment, I could not see how I was contributing to my own suffering because I would not allow myself to dream a better reality than the one that I was experiencing. The reason I could not dream a better reality is because I would not take my mind off of what was wrong in my eyes.

“Bondage is – subjection to external influences and internal negative thoughts and attitudes.” – W. Clement Stone

After being on this journey for as long as I have, I’d like to think that I’ve learned a thing or two about the truths of life. Thus far, what I know to be true is that the things that you resist in life, will persist. That is to say that whatever one focuses on, and whatever one gives their emotional energy to tends to linger whether positive or negative. This truth lead me to the awareness that I had created a reality for myself that even I disapproved of because I refused to instead shift my attention to everything else that had worked in my favor. In the words of Abraham and Esther Hicks,”I would not let things get good for me” because I was so busy focusing on what I thought was so bad. From this space, it is nearly impossible to welcome any of what God and the Universe has in store for us when we can’t even be grateful for the blessings that we have already.

“You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” – Mark Twain

It was revealed to me that nothing and no one outside of me had been more instrumental in keeping me from the life that I dream of living than the negative thoughts that I allow to fester in my mind. In this moment, as I share my experience with you, I am thankful for this newfound awareness, for it has now empowered me to know just how much power I have in co-creating my reality.

It is my wish that you will be blessed and brought to a more powerful level of awareness as a result of reading my story. After all, the truth is only a thought that you keep thinking until you believe that its true. DON”T BELIEVE THE LIES!

How much can you relate to my story? I’d love to learn more. Drop a comment below, or shoot me an email at bcstarkspr@gmail.com.

Love,

@BCSTARKS

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Words of wisdom

“Whenever you meet someone who is extremely critical of others, it’s usually because they are twice as critical with themselves. One can only effectively be the “thing” for others, that they are for themselves.” – @BCSTARKS

There is power in being kind to yourself

I’m at an interesting point in my life where I’m gaining a better understanding about the power of kindness and compassion for self.  Most of us would like to believe that we are kind and compassionate by nature, and to a certain degree we are. But kindness and compassion for self  is something that most people struggle with on a large-scale, including myself for some time.

It wasn’t until I came to understand the concept that you can only effectively be the “thing” for others, that  you are for yourself, that my eyes began to open. My personal struggle was that I couldn’t be as compassionate and kind towards others as I really wanted to  because I had mental blocks that wouldn’t even allow me to be gentle, or feel compassion for myself. At first this was a hard pill to swallow, that is until I began to dig deeper.

The truth is, I had always been very hard on myself, especially when it came to setting goals, and getting things accomplished. I’m not quite sure where I learned it from, but I recall being extremely critical with myself whenever I felt that I didn’t meet a certain goal, or complete certain tasks.   Guilty as charged.

Luckily for me, I was able to identify this as something that I NEEDED  to change within myself to allow myself room to grow in other areas. If I wanted to have a better relationship with life (which includes relationships with family, friends, partners, as well as better experiences, health, etc.) I needed to get a grip on showing myself some TLC, and a lot more of it.

In order to do this, I began to put an end to criticizing myself, even for the slightest of things. We don’t recognize what powerful messages we are constantly sending the Universe when we criticize ourselves. Every single time you find something to criticize yourself about, you are subconsciously telling the Universe “I’m not good enough.” Therefore, you attract experiences and people into your life that give you more validation of not being good enough. Think about your life long and hard, and try to understand what I’m talking about… This is exactly what I knew I had to put an end to. 

Once you become aware of criticism within yourself, you have to tell yourself the opposite of what you normally would, something nice for a change. Tell yourself you are beautiful/handsome, flaws and all; that you love and approve of yourself no matter where you are in life; that you are never lacking because God always provides for you; that you forgive yourself for anything that you previously disapproved of; that you are where you are, and that is perfectly okay because every situation in life is temporary; that you respect your life process and trust that you always make the right decisions that will add to your growth. All of these thoughts counteract the negative one’s that you’ve probably been telling yourself all your life. Repeating them as often as possible, especially when you feel the need to criticize yourself or others, will begin to set you free.

When you can focus on becoming a better you, there is no room for finding fault in others. Therefore, you can be genuinely kind and compassionate towards others, because you will begin to be it for yourself. More importantly, the Universe will begin to support every positive thought that you bring to it, and life will begin to be much more rewarding.

Remember, thoughts become things. And whatever it is that you choose to believe becomes true for you.

You wish for better, but do you welcome it?

Every now and then we all find ourselves at a particular point in our lives when we wish that things would get just a little bit better.  And boy is it easy to become so consumed with what is going on around you, only to forget about everything that is already “better.” 

During the course of my own life journey I’ve been known to complain here and there about how much I need a break from what life dishes out at me. Yes, guilty as charged. But it’s never really long before I am reminded of the role that I must play, in order for things to lighten up. 

First of all, there’s this little concept called “attitude of gratitude.” The way it works is that when you approach life and situations with the energy and intentions of being grateful, instead of being full of complaints, then Universe will only return to you more things to be grateful for. It really does work this way… TRIED & TRUE!  

But it must be accompanied by an additional action on your behalf. That is, letting go of whatever it is that you have held on to. This can be a number of things such as past relationships, old and new fears, bad habits, criticism of yourself and others, and past hurts and offenses among other things. These are the things that keep you in bondage and can block any and every blessing that the GOD truly intends for you. Without letting go of this excessive baggage, quite frankly you wouldn’t know better if it smacked you in the face.

Think about it, how often is it that you visit places where you know you are not welcomed, especially if  its overcrowded? My guess is that most people naturally avoid such awkward situations. Animals instinctively do this too, and life responds the same exact way. Only the  things that you welcome into your life become a frequent part of your life experience, because it’s what you allow at the time.

Learn to release those things that serve you no good because it’ll only be taking up the space within. If you don’t welcome better with open arms by releasing all things old, then how will the “good” ever come? You must trust that the very things that you are wanting, want you just as bad. But you have to make those things feel welcomed.

@BCSTARKS over and out! 🙂