Top 3 tips for staying motivated when you just don’t feel like it

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How often is it that you find yourself with a heap of things to do, yet you can’t seem to make yourself get around to doing them? Well if you’re anything like me, the answer is probably more often than you are proud to admit. But if we’re being honest about things, this is an issue that most people have dealt with at some point in their lives. And it’s one that I have come to learn a few quick fixes that get me back in shape. And I’m pretty sure they can work for you too!

So, what keeps you from getting things done?

Before we get into the solution, let’s talk about the root cause of having a lack of motivation. It all boils down to one word. Fear. Grrrrrrrr!

Fear is the ugly creature that creeps into every storyline to steal your joy, peace, and sometimes even rob you of the life that you were destined to lead. Read more about how crippling fear can beΒ here.

Think of it in terms of cause and effect. Better yet, think of what happens when you catch a cold. What are the symptoms of a cold? Runny nose, cough, tearing eyes, so on and so forth. The symptoms are what let you know that you are not at 100% with your health. They are only the indicator of something else. In this case, the virus that causes your body to go out of whack.

The same goes for fear. Fear is like the virus that leads you to do all kinds of things that you wouldn’t normally do. Hence the reason why for centuries, humanity has been asked the question:

What would you do if you weren’t afraid? – Unknown

Well this is the exact question you must ask when you find yourself putting off the very tasks that would only benefit you to complete.

Here’s my top 3 go-to tips for cutting the BS and getting it done!

Yes, I call fear a bunch of B.S.! Why? Well because fear is usually just a reaction that you have to the negative thoughts that you hold in your mind about certain subjects. It’s telling yourself over and over again that you are not good enough, that you can’t possibly get that thing done, that it would take way too much energy to do, that you will fail, or even somehow be destroyed by the process.

But when it comes to getting the things done that will help improve the quality of your life, such as getting that job, improving your finances, starting that dream business, etc… Putting it off will only keep your goodness from you longer. So here are the 3 things I’ve learned to do to get past this roadblock.

  1. Get clear about your fear: What scares you most about getting this task completed? Honestly, laziness is also a fear of being overworked. Rejection is never fun, and that could be another reason why you haven’t tackled your priorities. Whatever it is, know it and own it. You can’t fix what you don’t acknowledge.
  2. Ask yourself, ” What would it cost me if I don’t do it?”: Here is where we get real with ourselves about our current circumstances. If you are not where you want to be, then the only way to change that is to do something about it. You need to be clear about what your inaction could mean for your life. And the more severe the consequence, or the more you feel that some part of your life will suffer longer, the more of a priority it needs to be.
  3. Change your self-talk: 99% of all doubt comes from our own thoughts. The other 1 % comes from the rest of the world. So take some time to sift through your own thoughts and see how you may actually be acting as your own worst enemy. It always helps to feed your mind messages that are more likely to inspire you to take action. This includes reading books, or blogs like thisπŸ˜‰. Once you get your mind right about the subject, then you will be willing to do whatever is in your power to make something happen.

Hope this helps! As usual, the best conversations take place in the comments. If you have a comment or question, I’d love to hear from you!

Love,

@BCSTARKS

 

11 Self-Help Books That Completely Changed My Life

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Along my journey, I’ve had the privilege of coming across some pretty amazing literature. Some of these books have helped me accomplish many goals, including spiritual, emotional, financial, and relationship goals. Here, I share with you 11 of my favorite books that have had the greatest impact on my growth in many of the areas mentioned. In fact, I credit these books with having changed my life for the better. And I hope that you’ll explore them for yourself.

1. The Secret: I actually saw the documentary that the book was based on when I was a freshman in college. And I must have shared it with every single person I cared about. Sure, it’s been criticized for being a simplified approach to a more complex life principle. However, simplicity was the key for me to first: understand The Law of Attraction, second: recognized that I had practiced it unknowingly throughout my life, and third: to instantly put it to work, but this time with clearer intentions. I must say that because of its simple approach, I found it easier to focus on my goals and have them manifest one by one. From getting into my dream school, to getting jobs, and even getting the exact same car that I’d once glued a picture of on my very first vision board less than 1 year later. When I recognized how powerful my thoughts really are, it set me on a journey to exploring more about where some of my negative thought patterns come from, especially if they kept me from having the life that I always dreamed of.

2. You Can Heal Your Life: Another book that I’ve bought several copies of for friends and family in both print and audio versions.This book introduced me to the concept of having self-compassion (not sure if that’s a word) and empathy. It basically picks up where The Secret leaves off since it offers solutions for improving the quality of one’s thoughts, especially as it pertains to self-image. After all, we teach others how to treat us by how we treat ourselves. We also attract people and things into our lives based on what we think we deserve. Paying attention to self-talk is the best way to assess what you really feel about yourself. It also helps in getting to the root cause of those negative thoughts and forgiving yourself and others so that you can truly heal your life. This book offers positive affirmations for reprogramming a negative mindset and touches on metaphysics and the effects your thoughts can have on your body’s health. Two words: Great stuff!

3. Think & Grow Rich: The title of the book is self-explanatory. But I will admit that brother Napoleon Hill had me second guessing everything I thought I knew about education and the role that it would play in my life. In fact, I wanted to drop out of school before I could even finish the book, but Sallie Mae already had my name on a few documents so I had to finish. This book is an earlier version of The Secret and You Can Heal Your Life, but it offers more strategies with a business approach. Most entrepreneurs tend to appreciate a book like this. In fact, many well-known businessmen have credited this book with being the reason why they became so successful. It’s definitely left a permanent impression on me.

4. Getting To I Do: This book isn’t quite what its title suggests, but it does offer up some tips for both men and women to incorporate into their single, dating, and married lives. It is a MUST READ for those who feel a bit insecure in how to date or interact with the opposite sex (including with parents, friends, etc.) in a way that is healthy and beneficial for both people. I Β would say that it is heavy in psychology based principles of how men and women (masculine and feminine regardless of physical sex) interact with one another, and how we could interactΒ with much more harmony if we understood our own individual nature. Based on this book alone, I have a completely different outlook on relationships and interacting with the opposite sex. In fact, I plan to do some relationship videos laced with some of the principles I’ve learned from this book to help others put things in perspective. And yes, all of my close girlfriends were gifted or recommended a copy of this book. It’s a GAME CHANGER!

5. The Alchemist: The dreamer and believer in me absolutely loves this book! It’s a novel about a shepherd boy who goes on a journey to discovering his “personal legend,” which is the equivalent of his life’s purpose. It’s laced with jewels of timeless wisdom on just about every page. And it will definitely have you inspired to take of advantage of your time on Earth and pursue your hearts desires while you have the chance to. It’s one of those books that you feel the need to read every few years just to see how much progress you’ve made towards what you say you hope to accomplish in life. Let’s just say it keeps me on my toes and gets me right back on track when life’s circumstances can be distracting.

6. A Return To Love: This book is nothing short of miraculous. When you read it, you can feel love pouring all over you in the form of understanding, forgiveness, compassion, empathy, and just pure love. Marianne Williamson offers insight into life-lessons she’s learned based off A Course In Miracles, which is a Universal approach to Christian based principles. After reading this book, I felt so connected to everyone on the deepest levels of understanding. Not so much on the shallow tip, but you walk away with the understanding that we are more alike beneath the surface than we are different.

7.Β A Course In Miracles: As mentioned above, this is literally a life course. It’s like a companion to the Bible or whatever sacred book your faith is based on. Its pretty dense, but I promise everytime I read a page or practice a lesson, I become more open to life and I feel more grounded and loved than ever before. Let’s just say you’ll have to see for yourself.

8. The Four Agreements: Talk about getting to the root of almost all of the problems we face as human beings. This books offers four foundational principles that we should strive to live by, not for religion’s sake, but for our own sanity. Based on ancient Toltec wisdom, it touches on limiting beliefs and how we can just about rid ourselves of unnecessary suffering and lead our lives with more love, abundance, and happiness.

9. Blink: This book touches on the power of intuition, or thinking without thinking. Everyday we make decisions, and some are made instinctively, while others are made after thorough investigation. Many times, the best choices are made with little to no explanation, all because something within allows us to make snap judgements that need no justification. Love it!

10. Science Of Mind: I’m currently reading this one and it’s like another companion to whatever your faith is already. It’s metaphysics at it’s finest and it really focuses on developing discipline to creating a more harmonious world through our individual thoughts. Its philosophy is based on Christian teachings, but it also draws from virtually every spiritual faith as it teaches readers to guide our thoughts intentionally towards a life of health, wealth, success, love, harmony, and peace. Another feel good read every time you pick it up. It’s enlightening and refreshing, and it gives you a sense of peace and personal power.

11. Enchanted Love: The Mystical Power of Intimate Relationships:Β Marianne Williamson did it again with this one! For me, this one is so necessary for this generation as we have drifted further away from intimacy in our interactions with those in our lives. It’s a collection of personal essays, prayers, and self-reflection of interactions within relationships. It will have you open to acceptance and being accepted, forgiveness, love, intimacy, and attracting the right mate from the right space. It is ever enchanted and another must read.

There’s many more that I’d love to share with you. There’s also so many that I have yet to read. I want to know what books changed the game for you. Please leave a comment if you’ve read any of these books, and share some of your favorite reads below.

Love,

@BCSTARKS

Why Hard Times Can Make You Better


No one likes to struggle, but perhaps it’s not the worst thing ever when you look at how it can change you for the better. Not only can struggle  build character and help you develop certain survival skills (which can often translate into multiple areas of your life), but it allows you to become an expert on overcoming difficulties, particularly those circumstances that you’ve dealt with personally. Everyone loves a good underdog story of how one can take a bad scenario and turn it around and declare victory in the end. I’ve come to know that when we share our stories of overcoming obstacles, it inspires others and gives them peace in knowing that they are not alone.

Have you recently overcome something or are you currently going through a difficult situation? If so, what self discoveries have you come across? In what ways are you stronger, better, more equipped to handle things in the future? I want to know. Drop me a line in the comment section. You never know who you could inspire.

Love and Light,

@Bcstarks

Your Beliefs Create Things, What Are You Thinking?


What are you believing for your life at this very moment? For as a man thinks, so it shall be. Thought is a very powerful force that is constantly shaping our reality. The more you practice a thought, the more you believe it to be true. You are living your very beliefs, and some are mere ideas of the past that no longer serve you.

This is the beauty of being able to shift direction and choose new thoughts at any given moment. If your thoughts are spiraling in a negative direction, you have the ability to acknowledge it and choose a different thought, one that is closer to what you want to create for your life than not. From “right” thinking, one has a foundation to create the life that he sees himself having in his mind’s eye.

Beliefs are the driving force of action. We act out of whatever we believe to be true. So mind your thoughts and align your beliefs with the truths of life: Abundance, prosperity, love, courage, faith, Oneness, etc… Practice until it becomes a pattern. Remember, beliefs are only thoughts that we keep repeating in our minds until it feels real to us, and from there we take action. These actions and beliefs collectively create our life experience, so it helps to be intentional with our thoughts.
As always, I love feedback. I want to hear from you so feel free to comment below and don’t forget to subscribe!

Love,

@BCSTARKS

Shop The New Limited Edition (Unisex) “Within Me Tees” Collection!

BCSTARKS is at it again with her Lessons + Wisdom inspired Limited Edition “Within Me Tee.” From some of the greatest philosophers of all time, including teachings from the world’s most practiced religions, humanity has been given unlimited paths to discovering its true source of power. In the words of Jesus,”The Kingdom of God (Heaven) is within.”

Today, you can get your hands on these limited edition tanks and tees! Wear these words in style and be reminded to activate your inner power. Available in three different styles and varying color choices. Click the drop-down menu for styles and sizes, and choose colors just below.

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Women’s Flowy Tee

Unisex Premium Jersey V-Neck

Lessons From Ernest Holmes’ Science of Mind

This lesson reminds me of my work with grade school children. As an educator, you quickly become familiar with those children who’ve learned to “act out” for attention. Their reasons may vary, but their motive is the same: Disrupt by any means necessary.

My learning experience has been unique when it comes to classroom management. In an average classroom a teacher could have 2 or three disrupters. I’ve been so lucky to have had experience with nearly 10 times that many in one school year, and in one classroom. As emotionally taxing as it was, I learned that children will always express whatever the adults in the room expect of them. If the adult expects misbehavior, they will misbehave. If the adults expect that they will show effort, they do. And simultaneously, whatever the adults place focus on in a child, the child will express more of. For example, when a child is praised more for their kindness towards classmates than they are criticized for misbehavior, they will find ways to be more helpful, which could lead to less disruption from that child. Even in the classroom, whatever I focused within each child is exactly what they showed more of in behavior. The more consistent I was with my recognition of their good qualities, the more their behavior improved. 

It made no sense for me to resist their bad behaviors by bringing unnecessary attention to it. Not only would it interrupt the moment for those kids who are on task, but it would only make the disrupter misbehave more. Instead, as I shifted my attention towards what I wanted to see more of from them, it neutralized their bad behaviors and made them step up to the plate so that they could be praised for their good instead. 

The beauty in this lesson is that it can be applied beyond the classroom. In fact, it can be applied in every area of ones life. When Jesus said “Resist not…,” he didn’t mean that negativity wouldn’t exist. He knew that life was all encompassing, and that for every positive it’s opposite would exist. But what he also knew is that what you focus on most is what you will attract. And what you don’t give your energy to must flee. According to Holmes, we’ve been trained into expecting the worst, when our very nature is to EXPECT THE BEST. And the latter is what we should do ALWAYS.

When we make a decision to refuse to give our energy to negativity, and instead focus on positivity and those who bring good news, the bad will ultimately disappear from our personal experience. That doesn’t mean that it won’t exist in the rest of the world, but it does mean that it won’t be your experience, or anyone else who doesn’t entertain the thought of it. As we practice this spiritual law individually and collectively, we can “do more towards helping humanity than any charity has ever done.” 

Thoughts anyone?

Love,

@BCSTARKS

Today’s Wisdom: Education goes well beyond the classroom

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As an educator, this is what I came to know about the fundamentals of education around the world. Being educated is not confined to academia. In fact, some of the most educated minds had little to no schooling, yet they are full of information that resonates with the masses because they remain curious about life and tend to investigate beyond what the classroom would allow. While academia has its place, it cannot be a substitute for man’s own curiosity and imagination. One must use it as a tool to practice learning strategies, but then move beyond its limitations to discover the truth of life. This is the only path to true freedom, when one can learn the truth of who he is, the truth of life.

Love,

@BCSTARKS